Health Sci life in Ateneo

Ngayong graduate na ako sa Ateneo, gusto kong ishare ang feelings at karanasan ko nung nag-aaral pa ako dito. haha. ito una, Health Sci life ko sa Ateneo... isusunod ko yung AteneoBlueSymphony life, ASLA life, at (last but not the least), living in Ateneo as an LDS (Mormon) :D

i-edit ko na lang pag may nalimutan ako. hehe
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         Upon entering college, I only have one goal in mind, and this covers the other goals that I have before: to go to Ateneo, finish my course and become a doctor FOR my parents and family. This was my ultimate goal; this was my dream, this was the mindset that I have. I only have this goal for myself, and I felt that it was selfish. After realizing and understanding so many things now because of the education that I’ve got here in Ateneo, a lot has changed about me, about how I see things and how I respond to them. Before I have this goal for my own benefit, for my own future career, now I have this goal in for other people to benefit, and to help them to their own future. The Ateneo has helped me change my perspectives in life, and Health Sciences has enhanced that — it will forever be in me because of them.

         My goals haven’t changed during my stay in Ateneo, but rather, it became many. Before, I was only thinking of myself, but now, I have formed goals that I want to accomplish to help other people. Starting with my freshman year, I became familiar with the Ateneo culture like magis and being a man and woman for others. I was new to the culture, along with my blockmates who came from different places. Through OrSem, we got to know each other and start new friendships. It was really challenging since we are all from different hometowns, from different culture and different standards. At the back of my mind, I said to myself that I wanted to show them that I am a Mormon, that I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. And so, that’s what I am doing until now. Fortunately, they (my blockmates and other friends), were able to respect my standards and are also valuing it as much as I do. I am so grateful to them for that kind of respect and regard.

         I began my journey in Ateneo with people who are really understanding and caring; I had support and love from my family, especially when I get homesick because this was the first time that I have experienced to live away from them. It was tough, but I am glad I had my roommates and my God to rely upon, to seek comfort and strength from. Temptation and procrastination was also part of the challenge since I only have a few units, and I have more time than usual, than what I thought I would have compared to high school, it was so tempting to do other stuff. I was balancing out my academics and leisure activities. I joined a few organizations, but then decided not to become so active so that I may not lose focus on the academics and at least maintain a 2.75 or higher QPI for Health Sciences. Honestly, I felt overwhelmed with what I did in high school so much that I decided to have a low profile in college, so I was not able to do everything that I have wanted to do, especially to join Sanggunian (because back in high school, I was part of the student council from first year to fourth year). I said to myself that I would try different orgs, orgs that are not so familiar to me but still somehow related to my course, to help me keep myself inspired and motivated to study and pursue medicine in the future. I joined PMSA, and SPeed for my first year, until second year for SPeed, and third year for PMSA. Retention requirements for the org are difficult for me that time because I usually go home on weekends and their events happen on those weekends when I go home. At the same time, in our church, I was called to be the President of the Institute of Religion Student Council in Las Piñas Stake, so I have to consistently go home and meet with the members or update them.

         Just when I thought things are getting smooth and fine, they were not — tough decisions have to be made, for most of the time, they don’t happen the way I wanted or planned it to be. However, even though it goes like this, I will always depend and ask for the Lord’s guidance and love for me to keep going and to love myself, and what I do.

            Second year in college, I fell in love with my PE — Dancesports — and so I decided to try and be part of the club. That year, I was really into dancing, even in church; I was the payongera in our singkil dance every time we have to present a cultural show to a General Authority who would visit the country and the region. Dancing has helped me stay fit, and in the right posture and poise. I was also able to manage my time due to the stress and physical activity that I am doing. Because I focused on this, I neglected my other orgs and was able to join only a few activities and programs. I couldn’t help it, I was exploring myself, my wants, my desires, my interests and my priorities. And I think, for this year, it was dancing. I enjoyed it for I was taught a lot and it helped my body and mind to focus. But then I think, I was not destined to last here until senior year. Come third year, I joined Ateneo Blue Symphony and fell in love once more.

            Second year college was tough for this was the year where I have the most number of units and subjects compared to other year. Aside from that my mind is starting to be bothered if I really wanted to pursue to medical school or not. Factors and goals for and such as my church and family are already clashing in my head. It was really difficult. But then, I still relied on the Lord. I was really grateful that I not only learn about Him in our church, but also in Ateneo, through the Theology classes. Sir Badion has taught us a lot, and it was memorable and worth it. Health Sciences 1-unit courses have also guided me in getting to know the course that I have been into. We were taught how health professional should be Also, NSTP has made me see and reflect on the community and the children as we taught them basic nutrition lessons. They were really enthusiastic and excited to learn. This kind of exposure has helped get more inspired and motivated. There were times when I’d like to give up because of the stress and pressures around me, but then, thinking about the kids to whom I teach every weekend from 8am to 12nn, I always get the feeling that I have to keep on moving and never give up because someday, in time, I will be able to help them – that takes years of hard work and discipline, but I know I can do it, especially for them. Second year has given me a lot to reflect on, and I was bothered by it.

            My third year in college has defined me a lot. We were already building up on thesis; I explored more organizations; Philosophy and Theology courses were already taught; the subjects are getting harder and seemingly random; and I have had more exposure than usual. First, thesis: we were given time to plan as early as junior year to choose group mates and come up with a thesis proposal. Although the units were fewer than in sophomore year, we had 6-day classes this year for Epidemiology and Scholarly work classes. At first, we all thought that this was too much for us to handle, but then come the senior year, we were really thankful to have taken these subjects. Next, the Philosophy and Theology courses are starting to fill up my mind, my perceptions, my understanding and my heart. I was able to discover myself and get to know who I really am in the philosophical perspective. Family, other people, and the environment were also highlighted, especially in theology. The importance of family and love were highly emphasized. I am really thankful to my professors: Manny Dy and Fr. Pojol, for being able to teach me things and words of wisdom that I have been applying until now. These lessons have shaped my character, how I look at life (my own and others’) and how I should respond to it.

            I was also exposed to other subjects, which seemed very random for this course: LS and Accounting – although we were taught of the basic things compared to others, I haven’t seen the point of having to learn this until I took a business management course for my minor in Japanese studies. Because of this I have realized how this course (Health Sciences) has been shaping to be competitive in different kinds of fields, even those not directly related to medicine. These business management courses have helped me understand what and how it is like in the corporate world and how the field of medicine is connected to it, especially to the hospitals and the professional doctors.

            Furthermore, I was exposed to more people and more experience about Public Health in my junior year. Because of JEEP (Junior Engagement Program), I was able to experience how it was like to work for a health center in Marikina and assist the health workers and the residents in the area. In our time of duty, the schedule was for vaccination and other processes done to a baby. So every time we go there, the patients were the babies and their parents. Again, I have seen and realized how I can help others because of this experience.

            The last highlight of my junior year was the organizations: Ateneo Blue Symphony and ASLA. I eventually left Dancesports and decided to join the Ateneo Blue Symphony. Aside from the fact that I was invited once again by Argyll, I missed playing the piano and I felt that I needed to keep music in my college life since in Dancesports, I have started to have doubts because of the standards that I have especially in clothing – I don’t think that I will be able to wear such dancing clothes which exposes a lot of skin, and so I left. I entered a new org, not knowing if I can handle this, not knowing if I’ll get through this, but I still did. The first few rehearsals were fine, but as it we get closer to the target date of the concert, things were getting tough and stressful – everyday rehearsals, meetings and practices. It consumes most of my time, which is both good and bad – good, because I learned how to balance my time, now that I have more to do than usual, I need to organize myself and manage my time to be able to accomplish everything. However, the bad side is, it’s stressful for me – going home late, eating dinner late at night and then practicing when I got home, I felt like it was too much to handle. Nevertheless, I still continued and did my best, and I’m still here! Despite all the rants, all the physical stress, I have come to love the org and the members. I think this was the org that made me most welcome, and feel loved, which is why I stayed and I endured. I have learned a lot, and I have grown as an individual and as a social being. I’ve come to know more people and understand them also. I realized how different we were and how we should accept and help one another despite those differences. Now, I was able to perform in 3 concerts, and will also perform the last concert for me as a senior, on March 6. This org has helped me through a lot of things – in this org, I discovered myself, what I really wanted to have and what I didn’t want to lose; in this org, I fell in love, got hurt, but stood up and walked again; in this org, I felt pain and stress, but it only made me stronger; in this org, I was able to exercise my leadership and spread my love to others.

            The next org that have changed me also is ASLA – Ateneo Student Leaders Assembly. I was one of the 50 participants back in my junior year, and I came back as a facilitator now. This was a humbling experience for me. This is not like any typical leadership training that is usually done, rather the activities done here are according to the individual’s or the group’s needs as leaders of their own organizations. The activities are altered and modified in order for the participants to relate to the experience better. This is a wonderful program, especially to the student leaders. For me, I was able to discover more of myself, and my relationship with the Lord and other people. It always gives me a feeling of responding to the needs of the country and helping others to do the same. ASLA taught me to be myself and use my skills and knowledge to serve others and the country. Those notebooks, pens and reflections that I’ve had are always treasured in me and I use them most of the time to counsel with my friends. In ASLA, I’ve learned how to ask the right questions and have the right answer eventually. Bonding with the people whom I have come to know and trust, I was able to be more of myself and to exercise more of my leadership in so many ways.

            Last but not the least: my senior life in college. This is a kind of roller coaster ride for me. For my 4^th year summer semester, I studied FLC 1 in Japanese, and this made me pursue a minor in Japanese studies. After that semester, my thesis group mates and I went to Zambales to conduct a 10-day house-to-house interview for our thesis data. Living together for 10 days, immersing us not only with the community but also with each other and knowing that we have different backgrounds, different ways of living, manners, mannerisms, likes, dislikes. There were times when one is not in good terms with all of us. We called it “tantrums.” Every time someone changes mood, because of external factors, of not-so-personal reasons, there will be a bit of a conflict. Although we are already used to living away from the family, and living with roommates/dorm mates, it was a different feeling then, because we are in a different area — almost 4 hours away from home — and we don’t know anyone there, except each other and the people who helped us. Having to live within what we have in terms of money, materials; it felt like we were on our own. It was fun, but at the same time, it was really challenging and difficult. The experience made me feel how lucky I am that I am not living alone, that someone is taking care of me, that someone provides for me what I need. It was surprising for us that the people there were so accommodating, kind and helpful, even if we were strangers to them, even going house to house, to find the people in the list, they would do that much to help us. In this experience, my faith was really tested, challenged and used. I was not able to go to church for 2 Sundays, and I thought I felt weak. I read the scriptures and prayed more. But despite that feeling, I was touched and strengthened with the stories of the people I have interacted with. Aside from hearing the struggles directly from them, I also had a strong feeling of their sense of hope and faith in the Lord. Despite what they have experienced, they never forgot the Lord, unlike me, who is living a more comfortable life than them. The experience I’ve had had proven both my strengths and weaknesses. Here I saw how patient I was, but how vulnerable I was at the same time. Being humble not only to the people we were interviewing but also among the group: to control and resolve the tension experienced. Also, I became more concerned with the people there. A part of me was left with them because I became more aware of their situation. Knowing that I have the capability to help them, especially in the future, I realized that I really have to work hard. The people in Olongapo became my inspiration and source of happy memories. I am really thankful to have experienced interacting with them.

            I think what sums up my fourth year life are: Thesis, Ateneo Blue Symphony, ASLA, Japanese Studies minor, Philosophy and Theology and Health Sciences subjects, especially Physiology. Take one away, and I think my experience in fourth year life will not be as fruitful as I have wanted it to be. I have grown so much in every aspect of my life, compared to how I was back in first year – now, I’ve become stronger, wiser and more faithful. I have realized so much, I have loved so much and have been hurt so many times, but I also learned that giving up is not one of my options. I have learned that with everything that has happened to me, I must always think what else could I do in order to use them in a good way, and to have opportunities to serve others and the Lord.

            My 4 years in Ateneo de Manila University was really a great ride! There were ups and downs, there were romances and heartaches, there were so many chances and opportunities grabbed and neglected – they were all part of my experiences and treasured moments. I am glad to have spent it with the Health Sciences Society – this made me be the bigger person for others and be better in understanding them and myself also.

Institute

Institute class
It's good to be back in the institute class! :D I felt the Spirit's inspiration and revelation as we studied.

First: faith:
Moroni 7:33: And Christ hath said: If ye will have faith in me ye shall have power to do whatsoever thing is expedient in me
what comes to my mind here is, faith without work, is dead. Indeed, we can do anything for nothing is impossible with God, but then, it must still be aligned with His will for us. Faith will not work alone, we, also must do our part, as the Lord does His, to fulfill our heart's desire. 

Next: Charity and forgiveness
if two friends fight, what happens to the relationship? -it will be broken; after that, they could be friends again, will the relationship change? -Yes; why? the relationship will not be the same again, because it is already wounded; it may heal, but a scar is left.
This is not the same with Christ.
Moroni 7:46-47: charity: pure love of Christ. true forgiveness is to forgive and to forget.
Just imagine if we commit a sin, and ask for forgiveness. The Lord will forgive us, but He will not forget what we have done... how much more if we commit more sins? Kawawa naman tayo. But then, the Lord is not like that, Christ is not like that. He forgives wholly, totally, willingly, lovingly. And when He forgives a person who sincerely asks for forgiveness, He will forget everything that that person had done wrong. Isaiah 1:18: "though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool."
If the Lord, Himself, forgives, then we must also (Matthew 18:22): "...until seventy times seven," and then forget, as if nothing had happened. Mahirap, pero, this is true forgiveness

Last: Moroni 10:32 how to love
..."Love God with all your might, mind and strength."
Loving God is the foundation of loving others. When we love our Lord, we begin to love ourselves and appreciate everything around us, especially the people. When we begin to love others, we come to love God even more. But then, we are not perfect, we may hurt others or others may hurt us, thus love may be broken. But if we have God's love as our foundation for anything, we will receive comfort, we will be able to move on and move forward. God's love fills whatever is empty or is lacking. His love is always there, whether we feel that we deserve it or not.

Someone like Him

When people made mistakes, Jesus did not blame them. He rather took it upon Him, and forgave them, telling the Father that they knew not what they do. He willingly forgave and loved them even more. Even if people are mad at Him, even if they were indifferent, He did not do the same way. Instead, He showed them love and how merciful and forgiving He is. He did not let contention take over. He who understood more, forgave more and loved more. Even if he is not at fault, he willingly accepted everything, no questions asked. He is kind, gentle, loving, forgiving, understanding, everything a person could ever need. That is why He is our Savior, that is why He is our Redeemer and Friend. He understands everything, loves us in any way, and does not leave us even if we change, even if we make mistakes, even if we get mad at Him. He is always there. 
Most of the time, I would ask myself, what would Jesus do when He is in the same situation as mine? Now, I know the answer. He will love, understand, forgive and love even more. 
I forgot about Him for a time, and I felt that He called me to come unto Him. Then, when I was facing a problem, He is still there, calling me to come unto Him. He never forsake me, He was and will be there for me. 
He is the best example, especially for a Friend. So if anyone of us wanted to know how a true friend acts, refer it to Jesus and you will see.

Sensitive heart

Thank you, Lord, for giving me friends like them.

Yesterday, I've realized things about myself. I dont want my friends getting mad at me, I also dont want user friendly friends. I dont want my friends, especially those close to my heart, to stab me at my back. Sobrang babaw ng luha ko, konting problema lang iiyak na ako, because for me it is already a big deal. Kahit for them it's not. 
Last night till dawn, I've got to talk to people who are close to my heart. 
Enzo, Alec and I talked a lot about Blue Symphony family, it was nice and fun. :) I'm not leaving this org. 

Realizations
I think someone's right when he said this to me: (though I'm still fighting it) that your college friends will leave you when the time comes. Orgs are where you will find friends who will stay with you. Today I understood the last line, pero yung first line na sinabi niya, I'm trying my best for that not to happen. I'm still in the process and it was never easy.
Another realization, maybe, God made me to experience this because i have forgotten about Him these past few days. It's time to bring back the old habit of scripture reading and praying for comfort, love and understanding..
God made my heart sensitive to emotions, just like a loving child who doesn't want any fights or misunderstanding with the people she knows. God made my heart sensitive also for me to understand other people and help them as much as I can. But then, this sensitive heart is also vulnerable even to the slightest pain that will be inflicted upon it, thus needing other people with good hearts to touch and heal it.

Service

Dear IRSC,

It has been a while. A lot of the committee members have already gone on their missions, at may mga aalis pa. But because of this, should we, who are left, neglect the duty that is appointed to us? I think we are forgetting that we are part of this important organization. It may still be a baby organization in the stake, but this will be a stepping stone for everyone in Las Pinas, and we will be the pioneer officers, if in case this will continue on up to Las Pinas Institute of Religion. Isn't it great to hear that we are the first set of officers to represent the IRSC? Isn't it a good feeling that we were able to build the foundation for the future generations? But how can we feel this? How can we be proud of the service that we have done if we are not taking action now?

Take action, now. Contribute what you can. Take initiative. Inspire others and uplift them as you represent the IRSC. Let us be servants to them: to the YSA, to the Institute students in our stake. Don't let this opportunity pass by. We must be "anxiously engaged in a good cause, and do many things of [our] own free will, and bring to pass much righteousness." (Doctrine and Covenants 58:27). Our acts of service by being a part of IRSC would seem to have small impact now, but I know, that it will continue to grow and get bigger and better in the future. 

Let us serve, now. Serve them with passion. Serve Him "with all your heart and with all your soul." The Lord requires the "heart and a willing mind," so unless we have this, our service will be ineffective.

Know the reason why we serve through IRSC. I cannot answer it for you, I know all of us will have different reasons and motivations to serve. Ponder about it, and then think about what you can and will do for that reason. 

I know this is tough, this is challenging, but we are called, we are qualified, and therefore, we can do this. There is that joy of service that is incomparable to any feeling of greatness that a person can feel. Still, Elder Bruce R. McConkie said "Knowing is not enough, we must apply. being willing is not enough, we must do. Progress is not created by contented people. It is up to us, you and me, to be uncomfortable in complacency, to refrain from being spectators, and to be players in the game of life. The Lord has chosen His people to perform a mighty work."

Let us be an example to our fellow YSA and Institute classmates. Let us serve as the Savior did. Sabi pa, the greater your service, the closer your access to God. One who serves and sacrifices goes to bed at night with peace of mind. 

Let us all be eager to serve. Let us teach them to walk in the ways of truth and soberness, teach them to love one another and to serve one another (Mosiah 4:15).

I love you, guys.

PS. Plan for the February Activity please. :))

To grab every opportunity to serve Him

This month, the weather has been so weird, but I love it! haha. for weeks now, the country experiences cold breeze, even here in Katipunan, QC. It's so cuddly; what a bed weather.. anyway, it just sets me in a good and relaxing mood, though there are so many things to do...

With those many things, I still feel happy and motivated to work for it. The Lord has blessed me a lot since the start of the year. So far, things are getting well; I can really feel God's love through it all.. and because of this, I wanted to do something in return: serve Him in any way possible. This is what I want to do not only this year, but in the next years of my life.

This is only the third week of the first month of the year, yet I have learned so much from many different people, and had realizations in life.

1. Reality
Since it's the start of the year, uso ang gumawa ng 2014 goals for yourself and for others. I have planned goals already, and some of them involves other people, which includes my room mates. But then, I've come to talk to this person, who is so realistic, compared to me (medj idealistic kasi ako). And he assumed almost everything I told him in the negative perspective. Puro "what if it won't..." ang case. Pessimist lang. haha. Kaya nga may goal eh, may dream =  we'll make it happen. Pero he already assumes that we can't. Well it's a possibility; I know that he's trying to tell me that things won't always happen the way we (me and my room mates) wanted it to happen, but I know we can work it through somehow. Well in this experience, he had let me see the reality side of things. I started the year dreaming, and he reminded me that I must also consider what could happen in the real world. That doesn't stop me from dreaming, maybe he just made me realize lots of things and consequences that could happen because of the choices that I make in order to fulfill that dream.

2. Priorities
With lots of things in mind, and lots of things going on, I really should work on this. The hardest thing to do when it comes to making priorities is when one is torn between two good choices... This question would be helpful again: "Where are you needed the most?" and that is how I would weigh them. It is still tough, but it would cause me less regrets. haha.

3. Calling
Last saturday, we had recollection for Theo 131
Our relationship with others, with Christ and our call to love are the highlights of that afternoon. In order to love like Christ, one should know how Christ loves people, so, we first talked about the scripture passage, from the Catholic Bible's version, but I want to use our version in LDS:
1 Corinthians 13:4-7 
"Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,
Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil;
Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth;
Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things."
Charity or the pure love of Christ is what was being described in this passage. This is how Christ manifests His love to all of us, even until now. Since we already know how Christ show His love, it is now our task to do the same. As we establish relationships with the people around us, we impart a part of ourselves to them by showing our love and concern for them. We have many kinds of relationship and many ways of showing love. Our formator mentioned that there are 5 kinds of love: Physical, Verbal, Gift, Presence and Service. All of these strengthen our love for one another and for the Savior. 
This day, I have also learned more about the word Magis it is doing the more loving choice, not just doing more. It is doing something out of love for the other, not for your own. It is a selfless act, a loving and willing service given by a person. I've come to appreciate this word more especially when the couples Sir Rem and Ma'am Renee gave a talk and further elaborated the word Magis in their married life. They have inspired me to do the same as I serve others with love. 
One of the things that also made an impact on me was when I heard that my relationship with others is the way of our communion with Christ. Com: to be with, union, to be united = to be united with Christ. As such, I remember the passage, "Inasmuch as you have done this unto the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me," which was taught by Christ in the New Testament. So, how I really treat and serve people reflects how I wanted to treat and serve my Savior. That is a reason why I was called to respond to love, because I love Christ, and how can I do this? It is through the relationships that I build with the people around me. Once again, I was able to realize the impact of showing love for others, in the way that I show my love for Christ. 
The session went on, and we were able to reflect the scripture passage, as we replace love/charity with Christ, and later on, with our names. As we did, I have felt that the passage, was meant for me. That it somehow wanted to describe me, inspire me and encourage to have the qualities in those verses. I was able to find out in what descriptions do I feel comfortable with and what do I feel weak about...
Today, I was able to share what I feel, let it out to my small group, and I was also blessed to have the opportunity to share some things about my religion. I introduced myself and my religion, explained some standards that were different from the others, and that was where the Jesuit guy, Basil, explained some reasons about standards. He has been studying as Jesuit priest, and it was his 4th year. I am happy and satisfied with his explanations and how he was unbiased despite of the multi faith that we have in the group. 

4. Friends
True friends are just a few, and they are hard to find, so when you have one, take care of that person, keep on serving and loving him/her. Treasure him/her like a family. In this life, many will leave you, and many will forget you, but few will be there for you, will make you feel important and loved. 


There are still so much more that I have been wondering about, and I know that I will find out more this year. I will make sure that I will use these to serve Him :)

First time

December 21

•  

Today, I was home. Today, I had a dental surgery. Today, my wisdom tooth was removed. Today, I experienced a lot of pain, and it made me realize that I am not ready to die just yet.
The surgery went well, it was the aftermath that hurt a lot. Papa, mama and I all wanted to watch a movie after my dental check up. But it did not happen as planned. After the dental surgery, I felt weak, as any patient would feel. And so, mama and I went home, and ate ice cream. I slept for the rest of the afternoon to ease the pain. When I woke up, it was still hurting. I want to cry, but crying only made it more painful. And so I got up from bed and went to the sala where my parents were. I was still in pain, so papa bought pain reliever, and then we ate dinner. As we did, I felt strange. My vision was blurry, it was spinning and I can't focus on eating nor listening to what my parents were saying. And so I told them, "Nahihilo ako," I held my head, leaned on a chair. Then I did not know what happened. I passed out. The next thing I knew: papa was holding me tight especially my head, and mama was telling me something like "kaya mo yan." that's when I felt conscious. After that, they moved me from dining table to the sofa, fed me with rice and soup and took care of me. I saw and felt fear in our eyes. It was really unexpected. Mama told me that I was shaking when I passed out and so they held me tight.
Grabe, I did not know that it happened at all. Basta I woke up then, feeling weak to move.
In that moment of my life, I have realized I was not ready to die (I already thought of that possibility). I still have lots to do and lots to accomplish. I still have lots to apologize for and lots to be grateful about. I must never give in with what may hinder me. I must be strong. With the Lord beside me, I know I can do this.
You may say, nahimatay lang naman, di naman masyadong grabe. Well for me it was since it was my first time. Through this, I was able to realize again the blessings that I have and the hardships that I must face and surpass.
I am really blessed to have a family like what I have now. I am blessed with love and care around me. 

Center

What is your center? If he chose you, you must have something important in you.
What makes you you?

Once again, I have pondered for myself such simple thoughts with deep impacts. The first line was from the movie, the Rise of the Guardians. because of that, I remembered again my past experiences, especially through ASLA. :)

My center? Just like Jack Frost, I don't know. I have not fully discovered it yet. Nevertheless, I know what I wanted to do for now. What I know is the Lord is with me, and as I make Him the center of my life, I would be able to do so much, more than what I think I am capable of. But it does not end there, I myself must also be engaged in things and activities that would lift me up and make me grow personally. In this way, I would be able to lift others as well, just like a guardian. haha

okay. the movie was so great that I extracted simple lines and details from it and applied it to myself.

next, one important thing is to believe. Believe in what you want to believe, especially to something that you treasure and to what you will stand for as long as you live. It is never too late; as long as you have a reason to believe, you can believe. :)

next, "how can I know who I am, when I don't know who I was?" another applicable line, huh. now I'm assessing myself. haha, who am I in the past, and what made me who I am now? as the second line in this entry says: what makes you you?

don't be so busy bringing joy to others to the extent that you have no time to be with them.. the most important thing is to create memories with people that you love the most. Just be with them, be there for them, and it would mean a lot

"I know it, I can feel it... in my belly."

Understand

A lot has happened to me this week; and above it all, I have learned something more about Understanding

This week is a mixture of happiness, sadness, disappointment, and anxiety due to many circumstances.. This week, I was hurt, I was afraid but eventually I became happy and satisfied..
This week, I have regretted things but I also have treasured moments..

At some point, it was really difficult; it was like hanging on a cliff, and thinking if I should let go or not. Thankfully I didn't let go. It is because of understanding that I considered the consequences for the choices that I will make...

This week, I was able to apply what I have learned in the Institute: to understand the situation; to act rather than to react. For a lot of times I felt like I should be the one to understand. For a moment, I was physically  but unintentionally hurt; For a while, I was forgotten. I specifically felt lonely. But will I let it devour me? Will I let my sadness take over every second of my life? Of course not, sayang ang time. I understand; I wanted to be happy, and so I will be. Though the pain is still there, it was, nevertheless, lessened and healed. What was left now was a scar, a sign that I have experienced something and that I have learned from it.

My teacher said that the greatest spiritual maturity is according to how a person responds to the weakness of the other. I think what he was trying to tell me was, knowing that the other person experiences something as his weakness, how can try and help him or her? well, first, understand the person. and then, see him in what he can become, and not in what he is now. Even great people make mistakes, but do we see them according to their petty imperfections? di ba, NO. We see them as someone who contributed so much as to influence many people around the world. maybe in this way, i will also try and see other people.

my approach to mean things

When you feel like someone or something is demeaning you, what are you going to do?
You might say, well, I will just ignore him/her, it's not true anyway... but then, if it's true, you might say, how dare he/she talked to me like that! who is he/she to say such mean things. with matching emoticon pa. haha.

anyway.. easier said than done; when you are in such situations like that, it would really depend on how and what one should feel.

I do not intend to talk about a certain someone, I just wanted to express how I feel about this idea/situation.

First, no one can make you feel inferior but yourself; likewise, no one can offend you unless you yourself chose to be offended. Those mean words, bad treatments done to you won't affect you much unless you let it within you. Yes it hurts, but don't take it in, especially if you know that you haven't done anything wrong.
It has always been the tendency of people to judge others, especially their imperfections. From those judgments come misunderstandings, up to the point of "personalan na," in Filipino...  So if you don't want any fight or problems, stop judging, unless that would lift a person's feelings and improve his/her behavior...

Second, if I will be placed in that situation, I might as well accept their judgment about me. I, or we, cannot please everyone - that's a given fact. now, what we can do now is to improve ourselves. Let us use those negative ideas about us as motivations or opportunities to improve, step up and be the person that others did not think we are. That would be a counterattack to people who look at us negatively or wrongly.

Third, ask the Lord for help. There will be situations wherein we would not be able to control ourselves especially when the judgments about us are completely wrong. Pray to God for comfort, to be cool and calm in handling these situations. Count 1-10 as you inhale and exhale, and ask for guidance. The Lord will always be there to help us, so don't ignore nor forget about Him :)


Sometimes, we won't entirely know why a person does or says offending things to or about us, but whatever their reasons are, we, who could understand more, should consider certain things that has affected the situation and understand why it became like that.

ciao.

November Experience

My last week of Sem break was spent in Pangasinan

I missed my family, and I was excited to impart what I have learned in ASLA. I was able to share some, but not everything yet. We spent every day in Pangasinan very well. Almost no idle time, just at night before everyone rests. we went to Manaoag, Dagupan and Baguio; I missed going there. And for the first time, I am going to miss an animal that I thought I never wanted, a dog. haha! specifically, my lola's dog. Hero is just a sweet dog, I forgot the breed, sorry. :)) He sniffs your feet or legs, and wants you to pat his head. What I love most about him is, he is malambing and he does not bite. I just noticed and realized now that his eyes were like telling me that he is scared of people that's why he is just that kind.
Time moves, and so must we. after that week, my tito brought me back at the dorm, and second sem starts...

Still, a lot has happened this month, not only for me, but for the whole world.
there is the earthquake that struck Visayas, the typhoon Yolanda that went through Tacloban and other neighboring islands, and the non stop relief operations held almost around the world.

wait, for me first...
I lost my phone, this month, I forgot when, but I completely remember where: in UP town center.. I went back to check on it, but I found nothing.. well, it's ok for me. I still have Kuya's phone, and my Sun number, so just text me through that number.. :)
I have also had philosophical and theological conversations with my course-batch mates :)) haha. This is what I call an application. I always feel wonderful whenever I share my insights philosophically and sometimes theologically according to the situation. I know these subjects are those that I will treasure the most with my Ateneo Education, that is why I am savoring and using every bit of it. :) lol parang pagkain lang :)))

An inspiring movie... Ip Man I and II. These were such good movies, so nationalistic. Mr. Ip would do just anything to protect his country and his people through what he does best: Wing Chun. :)) It almost made me want to learn the moves. haha. Watch these guys, you'll never regret spending time for it. :)

anyway...

now for the bigger matters. The country experienced great challenges and sorrows this month. Again, there were the typhoon and the earthquake, both struck at the middle part of the country. These were both saddening and alarming for everyone. Our church has emphasized again on the council given to us years ago about the 72-hour survival kit, and how we should prepare both temporally and spiritually. The Lord has a purpose in all things. Just a personal opinion, maybe, somehow we are little by little forgetting His ways, His standards, His commandments; maybe we are indulged in matters that does not please, which is why He needs to remind us once again of His power - that only through Him, we can be eternally happy, that the things of the world will only give temporal happiness and a sense of guilt with the wrong acts that we have done. I really don't know the reason, but the Lord does. Whatever His reason is, I know it is for our own good..
As we all saw, these tragedies also brought everyone together in an action that would help the victims, without considering any deeper constraints (like religion or cultural beliefs), only the transactions and transportations of the goods. I was able to see and talk to dedicated people during these times and was also inspired to give myself and do things that would help the relief operations. It was a heartwarming experience. Truly, giving service is not exhausting. I have always looked for opportunities to help others, and through this, I was able to grab one. I always want to help; if only my body's health would not deteriorate, I could have done more. After a week of helping, I got sick. No complaints, though; I am always thinking that the victims of the disasters were experiencing more than what I do. I am just glad that I was able to at least help in simple ways, especially when I was physically able to do so.

it was such a humbling experience. Now, I am thinking of how we could even celebrate Christmas, while thinking of other families who need help.. Well maybe, I'll figure it out this month. :)

October experience

"Step Back. Think about things well. Choose. Act."
-Guido Sarreal (Thanks, Kuya Guido!)

I can definitely say that I have had a fruitful October this year. A lot has happened and I was able to endure them all...

The month of October every first sem is the deadliest, (haha) because this is the month for finals exams, final papers, orals and mock proposal thesis defense for us. Even though it seemed like a lot, there were certain lessons that I have pondered and gain through these experiences before taking a sem break.

First, in everything that I do, I should be honest, whether or not somebody is looking. Like in our Epidemiology finals, due to some problems, our final exam were conducted online at a certain time. That experience gave the evil side a lot of advantage for temptation, to all of us who took it, to just look at the notes while answering an online exam, nobody would see it anyway... well, nobody?? How about the Lord? If you did that won't you feel guilty, even if you received high grades after? Well, I stood by what I believe in, I answered the test without cheating. Afterwards, everything felt so light, considering the fact that that was my last exam for the sem... :)

Second, in my oral exams, I have learned about the importance of real life application. These subjects like Philo are not only studied to learn, but also to use it or integrate it in every experience that we'll have. Applying the lessons taught here, (also in LS, and Theo), would make us think broader, and deeper.

Third, you just cannot accomplish everything on your own. The more task you do, the more you will need others to help you. Indeed, being dependent is good, however, do not ignore the fact that other people are there to help you. I have received a lot of help for this month: from my friends, blockmates, thesis group mates, my family, my church friends, my org mates, and my God. They were all there, beside me, to help me through it all. I will be forever grateful for their love and service.

The last two weeks of October was sem break...
I spent the first week at home. It has been months since I stayed there for a long time. I felt secured, protected, and happy in my home, with my mom (Papa is working overseas, Kuya is a missionary in CDO, Philippines). I told her a lot of stories and experiences that I have had this sem, it was all wonderful, and I'm glad to let her know everything, down from acads to personal life. :> she is my best friend, I just can't keep any secret from her. :')

the second week was spent with the ASLA community. October 22-26: the memorable dates of my life. no time wasted, everything's fired up with passion and love, as I discovered myself once again, along with my batch mates who share the same vision and dreams with me. We were all able to grow and develop our self-awareness, see the importance of others, immerse ourselves with the people in Antipolo, so that we will know their daily experience and be inspired to take action because of that, and to take steps in fulfilling our dreams for our own communities through day 6.
It was such a powerful experience. The ASLAns were able to move me and were even helping me ignite the burning desires of my heart. I am in Day 6, and I will always be here because I will never stop giving myself for my organization. Yes, I have many dreams in life; but then, as of now, where I am needed the most is where I will devote my time to. And I know in my heart that I am needed at my church organization. Now that I have learned so much, what I will do is to share it to others. I will help in any means possible. I have become more dedicated and motivated with the work that I am doing.. I found "my because" through my journey in ASLA, and I will always continue shaping that "because" in a way that the Lord wanted me to.

Purpose

Everything happens for a purpose.

This is my statement of the day. haha. Since Sci10 class, ito na ang "theme" ng araw ko. I have learned the 6 seconds of the Big Bang, which started from singularity, to the formation of Life in just a corner of the universe. I was really amazed on how Doc Sio discussed the Origin of the Universe so clearly. nagka- "ah" moment ako nun. I understood what Father Ben Nebres tried to say last plenary session. HAHA. ang galing ni Doc Sio! :)

next.. huhu. last session with Sir Jallorina for Physics Lab! GRABE ang practical exam. halos mamatay-matay kami sa kakaisip ng sagot. haha. pilit lang mga ngiti namin jan sa picture. lol. Thanks for the picture Marvs. :D

as i said in my twitter, I felt down and blessed at the same time. Ask me personally for the specific details haha. Because of this, I, again, realized that everything that has happened gave a purpose to my life. Everything that I have known, understood and felt not only this day, but also everyday; not only in terms of time, but also in terms of places, things and people. Everything and everyone came to my life with a purpose. I also learned how to appreciate it today - that even a tiny moment in my life would mean a lot to me. 

Weeklong experience

HI again.
after a week of MIA, I am back again to express myself with my experiences and realizations for the past week that I had. Here it goes :)

September 22:

The rain's not stopping. Still I attended church service and got to spend my time with the Lord, and lots of work after (later in the evening). Push lang, last 3 weeks na lang eh (at this time) :))

September 23:

I woke up at about 7 or 8, then when I got down from my bed, I found out that classes are suspended. SO yeah I ate breakfast and get all the work needed to be done, supposedly, haha. I also watched movies at the same time, pero di ko rin natapos :))

Chat with Blue Symphony friends, as we planned to hang out somewhere this day. And so we did, sa Bo's Coffee, Katipunan: Rein, Jessa, Nicole, Marc, Guido, Jez, her friend, Joana, and of course, me. :) ayun tambay lang. bonding time. haha. sabay nasagi yung coffee at nabasa at namatay yung laptop ni Jez... I felt her sadness, laptop kasi, almost all files are there, and wala pa siyang back up drive. so, nakakatakot. pero anyway, it happened already, at kaya pa namang ipaayos yun. I just hope everything will be fine after the shop repairs the gadget.

anyway. I have learned a lot today. I had the experience to have an evening conversation with intellectual people. We talked a lot about the school, their past experiences there: horror, academics, love life, and lastly about philosophy and religion. I am glad that I was able to share a part of the gospel, the Word of Wisdom. 

Here I reflected and realized how important the Institute is in my life as a Latter-day Saint. Since many people do not know a lot of our religion, I should be ready or prepared to share what I know and what I believe in and live by. I felt a warm feeling of joy within me as I share a simple thought about the gospel. Now I felt more motivated to continue what I planned to do after graduation - to be under the Lord's care, to be a sister missionary, for 18 months. :)

September 24:

yes, we have classes na.

we watched Rashomon movie in Philosophy; the movie is based from the short story: In a Grove.

you may click on the hyperlink to know more of the story :)

basically it just tells how different people perceive a single thing or event differently. and this perception/view satisfies what they want, and not the truth. in the movie, it was somehow implied that man is naturally evil, but at the end of the movie, the viewers were given a message that despite this evil world and mostly bad people, there is still some hope in mankind, because of the genuine kindness within ourselves. 

Zumba night: so refreshing! :D

September 25

Preparation for LS orals. sometimes I get the feeling that I am not really meant to be in the business world. yes, nakaka enjoy, but I don't think I won't love it for a lifetime. haha, sorry business-minded people :))

Today our department head, Doc Sio, asked us to give time to share this needed information: 

come on guys, let's help Zamboanga. 

the donations will be until October 1, because on October 2, the materials will be brought there. let us help as much as we can :)

Today I learned that Ma'am Cuyegkeng and Roldan had helped Arn (founder of Blue Symphony), when he was at his worst times and situation as the Blue Symph org is starting. I was really touched with the compassion, love and concern that they have given to Arn to help him with what he was going through. without their help, Blue Symphony will not be completely established as it is now. :)

September 26:

the LS orals was fine naman, we were able to answer the questions well. I hope we had good grades :)

good vibes with good grades in Histo today. haha. more motivated to study! 

Jogging session naman, then dinner and bonding time with Blue Symphony friends.

September 27:

I attended a talk today about Public Health. This was discussed by Mr. and Mrs. Swanepoel. Their services in Palawan are inspiring. Though they said that they don't earn much in such Organizations, they still pursued and sacrificed a lot for the people in Palawan to teach them about reproductive health and many more (especially to young mothers, and children). Mrs. Swanepoel even mentioned that Public health professionals are needed today in the Philippines, and you don't have to finish a medical degree to be a health professional (well, that made me think), because having this degree is only a bonus point. well that talk gave a point for me to be a public health professional. lalo na when they described the impact that they made with the people, despite a lot of difficulties :) It was a nice experience. thank you health sciences society for that COT. :)

September 28:

Disney night. I'm with Ina, Enzo and Rafa. then, with the Blue Symphony friends. hehe. we had fun. the orchestra performed beautifully and lovely. I was really attracted and brought there and back again to Disney. I felt like a kid for a time. haha. I was blessed to witness wonderful people imparting their great talents to us, their audience. It's such a blessing to have music in our lives. As Mr. Gerard Salonga said, music teaches a lot of things that could make the world a better place; things like discipline, diligence, etc... not only does it give us a good feeling, but it also brings us up with good attitude.

All in all, I had a lovely and blessed week. Now I feel ready to face another set of challenges again. I know I won't be alone. This week, I choose to face everything with courage and confidence. :)

September 21

GREAT DAY! super fun, 24 hours of fun experience :D

1) Project LAAN Kapihan Session in Galvaville, Calamba Laguna
Okay, so wala sa usual na kasama kong Health Sci friends ang kasama ko ngayon, except for Rafa. Pero bonding with other Health Sci friends, sounds fun. And yes, it was! :)) Grabe ang dami kong tawa hahahha. They were fun to be with, kahit asaran ang peg. kasi alam namang joke joke lang yun :))

this is their community. It was a wonderful community; even they are far from the city, and the many buildings and stores, I could say that they live peacefully. When we interviewed the mothers and the grandmothers here, and asked about the problems, they could not think of any, except for health problems due to the location of their place and the health centers. Aside from that, there was nothing else.

We played with these kids, haha, medyo fail yung game but everyone enjoyed. We, the facis, lost all games. haha.

Kapihan Baby 1 = 1 marshmallow inside the mouth without chewing
Kapihan baby 2 = 2 marshmallows...
paramihan sila. of course, everyone won the prizes :D

because it rained...

Next...
2) Blue Symphony Party
KASI ANG TRAFFIC. We were stuck at the bridge near Ateneo for more than an hour (yung so close yet so far ang peg) hahahah. kasi Enzo and others are waiting for me to go to Miggoy's place, where the party was held. Ayun, di tuloy ako naka costume hahaha! my shirt was LAAN shirt pa, pero oks naman. :)
I missed Blue Symphony agad, haha clingy much. ang daming alumni, I felt like we were dominated. haha! pero oks lang, they haven't seen each other for a long time, and besides, it is Blue Symphony's birthday, so everyone who is a part of the Organization is warmly welcomed. ang saya lang! haha, daming pagkain and some pakulo care of Angela and Luke :D
Some pictures with my friends!!! :D sorry for the low quality :))

With Voldemort, I mean, Nik! haha. our Bassist :D

With Christa and Jessa: Violinists

 With Enzo: Flutist, VPOps :D

With Jez, Violinist..

With Arn, one of the founders of Blue Symphony :D

With David Ples, Cellist, and VP HR

With Sir Miggoy, Pianist Section head. :D  hahahah

With Axel, Prod. member, he's a member of every PAC orgs. :))) edi siya na, haha!

With Nicole, Flutist :D

With Willa, Cellist :D

Marami pang pictures, sa iba, haha. ito lang sa akin. basta you get the point, I had fun! :D We all did. Buti walang alcohol drinks. haha. para less problem/danger/conflict, more fun and bonding. haha! I love Blue Symphony family :D

But wait, there's more... Enzo, Jez and I went to Maginhawa, QC pa to watch Guido and Jed in their gig. We saw Jette and Paps there. so nakapagkwentuhan pa after... :D

September 21 WAS REALLY A BLAST. If I was not a part of any of these Orgs, this would not have happened to me. I really felt blessed and happy that day. Not only was I able to serve other people but I was also able make them happy. I am blessed to meet everyone in Blue Symphony, they are all wonderful and inspiring people. :)

Back

Sorry, 5 days absent sa blog. haha!

anywaaaay...
Significant moments in my life so far...

September 18
Sci 10 plenary session with Fr. Bienvenido Nebres, about the origin of life/universe.

ASLA GA. I became more excited and interested of what will happen to us, and especially to myself. How will I feel and realize after that 5 days in Antipolo? What will I do at day 6? I am already wondering what part of my self will change or improve. Basta, i am so excited, kahit na may nagsabi na ibblender at babasagin daw kami. Challenge accepted na! :)

September 19
Orals in Science 10: I really love Doc Sio, nag pinoy henyo kami and almost 15 minutes kong hinulaan ang hinahanap niyang word. haha! nakakahiya na nakakatawa at nakakatuwa. :>
I got this thesis statement: "the more I examine the universe and the details of its architecture, the more evidence I find that the universe in some sense must have known that we were coming." -Freeman Dyson

after our classes and this orals, i jogged with Renee, pero I had cramps kaya I was able to jog for 20 minutes lang. nag stretch and exercise na lang ako like sit ups, jumping jack, sit and reach, etc. :))

September 20
FRIDAY. Plenary Session with Fr. Jose Ramon Villarin about getting green and go mainstream.

He borrowed my ring to ask everyone in the hall if we could survive for three days, first, without a bottle of water (the one that he's holding in his right hand), or second, without a ring (my ring, in his left hand). Because I admire Fr. Jett, I wanted to take a photo of him, but then, sakto when I was taking his picture, he turned around and called my name and asked me if I can survive for 3 days without my ring. To my surprise, I immediately put my iPad down and unconsciously said NO. haha! they all laughed, even Fr. Jett. haha, I was supposed to say yes. pero, wala na. hahahah! nakakahiya (medj hahaha).
katuwa... well, we have many photos with him, I even have a selfie with Fr. Jett, my profile picture on FB now. :D They were all envious haha. nahiya na talaga ako. I said thank you, and I received a tap on the head. :))

Otaku Cafe with Nadine. :) at the MVP Roofdeck

me and Nadine. hihi :>

okay! Good vibes all the way.. even in the last practice for Blue Symph this sem... EVEN IN OUR THESIS MEETING. WE WERE ALL SO HAPPY, it was very productive and successful. :)

Okay. work work work.
Next blog.. LAAN, then, party party party moments :D

Jolly

Since Sunday, I have been blessed to feel good and physically well. :)

I was able to attend the whole church service again. and I really felt inspired, but hungry. haha. So yeah, that day was also the UAAP Cheer dance competition; unfortunately, ADMU didn't win, pero I still know we were so great and that they performed well, so it's okay. bawi bawi next time. 

Monday: usual, daming meeting.. pero bonding pa rin with group mates. with the established relationship, being able to open up anything with them is not a problem..

..hmm, rehearsals again.. my first time to see most of the Blue symphony performers again after some weeks. Some were not present, while there some who came back and who are new. And yes, masaya pa rin! :") group hakot, then group dinner and bonding sa Kenny's :>

Tuesday: no philosophy 101 today. :( my day is incomplete. haha. will just read Dr. Dy's handout na lang.. sa SA naman, reporting, free food! haha. KFC. :)) 

anyway, we jogged at Moro Lorenzo Sports Complex today, me and Ina.. such a refreshing feeling. 

ang bilis ng panahon, tapos na kalahati ng September, next niyan, October na.. pero kahit ganun, we can still do our best and seize every moment that is given to us. Mabilis na nga eh, let us go with it, do not let it pass by. Let us pace up with time and keep ourselves busy as we enjoy and love what we do.

Dreadful with Purpose

0913
A depressing day of my life. was it also because of the date (friday the 13th, as they say)? well, I do not believe that, pero I was really sad because of the long test, but I was then comforted by the principles and doctrines that I have learned in the Institute.

Sakto ang lesson. It was just what I needed.
We talked about the Books of Enos, Jarom, Omni, Words of Mormon and Mosiah 1-3

--> I was reminded again of the importance of keeping records: it is for the benefit of the future generation, for them not to learn about their ancestors, and not repeat the past mistakes that were done.

--> When you feel happy, converted and blessed, you would also feel that others must experience it as well, and that is why we spread the gospel. :)

--> If you are motivated by LOVE, you will never give up. (Applicable to anything, kahit hindi love life. haha) seriously, ito na motto ko. haha.

--> Let us come unto Christ for us to be guided and protected. "If we give our all, we will get His all from the greatest of all"

--> Then we were asked, What can you give up to come completely to the Savior? Something to ponder about... take note that sacrifice is giving up something good for something better...

--> The Lord knows all things that will come. So trust in Him, because He works in us to do according to His will, if we remain faithful and obedient. What I remember about this is the quote from the book "The Alchemist." Sabi dun, when you desire something, the whole universe conspires to help you get it. Well, it is because of the Lord. As I have said from my past blog entry, if we desire something, God will give it, especially if it is according to His will. The Lord makes the universe work for us, so that we can achieve what we desire.

--> Lastly, Do you want to be happy? Do you want your problems to be solved? Do you want true and lasting happiness? if yes, then SERVE.
through service, we can help others get their needs, and we can help ourselves feel, grow and realize that our problems are just small things compared to others.
I'm sure most of us have already felt a kind of happy feeling when we serve others, it is really different from the feeling when we were just having fun because of material things. That feeling of joy when serving is really comforting and heartwarming,. di ba, di ba, di ba? :))

so there, fruitful night. My sadness earlier in the afternoon was covered up by these principles that I have realized again. :)
Everything has a purpose, and the Lord knows what purpose it will serve for me... :)
As Joseph Smith said, "Sometimes, the Lord brings us low, before He can lift us higher." :)